Trust

Its been a while since I wrote here but today I feel compelled to write.... not for the blog but for myself. Life has been a constant pursuit of balance and at the juncture that I am, its a balancing act of TRUST. I have always had issues with trust and apparently age only makes it worse. But trust is trust and you either trust or you don't, that is what it is supposed to be alteast in an ideal world. In the real world its a whole different game. You don't trust someone to the extent that you stop thinking. And I can't imagine the restlessness with not trusting at all. Do you see the balancing act? how much is too much and how little is too little? most of the times we intuitively know but there are times when it can get nerve wrecking. It also means that you should have immense amount of faith in yourself, to believe you are making the right move. But righteousness, truth are very subjective so what is my right at this point may not be the best right for my future. Does it really have to get so complicated. What is the risk you take by trusting/not trusting, effectively you are avoiding the feeling of being cheated. The actual collateral damage is one part but the emotion of being cheated stays much longer to the point that you think a hundred times before you trust again. In a balanced life aren't there 'n' number of times you are loved /hated, trusted/cheated etc so is is better to be cautious or to let go. Life if full of paradoxes and that is making me dizzy.